Sin

Everybody has a definition.
Google "what is sin" and there are countless articles. Most of the articles have to do with sin being an act of disobedience or rebellion. One article said that sin is when the Bible says, "Do not lie" and you lie, that is sin. Another way that one defines sin is lawlessness; living outside the laws of God. And when the question arises of how sin entered the world, it's nearly universal that it started with one man-Adam. As I said, everybody has a reason as to how we as humans beings started sinning and everyone has a definition of sin.
And maybe that is where the problem lies right there. When Adam and Eve were in the Garden of Eden, two trees stood in the middle of that garden, the tree of life and the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. I find it interesting that of the two trees, the tree of the knowledge of good and evil was the one that God said that they must not eat of. Not surprisingly, that would be the tree the serpant would tempt the woman to eat from. But what was it about the tree that God did not want his creation to partake in? I see it as two choices God set before Adam and Eve-one was life and the other knowledge. Knowledge was more desirable than life. To know is better than to live. The problem is when the fruit was eaten, it was not the knowledge of God that was imparted into man, but man's own knowledge. It was not the act of eating the fruit that was the sin, the sin was they now had a knowledge apart from God; a knowledge that unfortunately would cause them to judge themselves (i.e. realizing their nakedness when before they felt no shame). God was absolutely correct when He said that by eating of the tree they would surely die. It wasn't a physical death in as much as a spiritual one-something that rings true to this day. How many Christians suffer from idolatry or reoccurring sin, or so they say? Did God say? Or are they now interpreting the bible the way they believe it to mean and killing themselves with meaningless and endless behavior modification?
I believe that it was God's desire that man live forever, but after the tree was eaten from, God saw that if man lived forever, then man would be outside relationship with Him forever due to their own definition of good and evil. So he limited man's years so that He could restore the relationship later down the road. God could have allowed man to be corrupt but He desired fellowship with His creation so much that He could not allow that to happen. Enter Jesus: the King of Kings in human form who did not consider equality with God something to be grasped even to the point of living forever, so he gave up His spirit to reconcile man to God. Because of that we can know God's definition of good-his creation. Not once in the garden did God say that Adam and Eve are evil or corrupt. He was just grieved that they were outside relationship with Him which I believe means, they had a knowledge of themselves that was not based on how the Father saw them. I believe God is bringing us back to that place where we truly see ourselves and define ourselves the way He sees us, not evil but good.

Communion

It's amazing to me how communion has found its way in the religious community to mean so many different things. First, I am amazed at how the Last Supper has become the last snack. Bread and wine has been replaced with small crackers (not even Saltines) and grape juice. The funny thing is that is not even the best part. The part that gets me is by not examining the heart before partaking of these, that the person is heaping judgment upon their own head. Now the first response before I go any further will be, "well the bible says that. It says to examine yourself." To which I say, "true." But by not seeing the scripture in its proper context, all that is being done is proof-texting. What is the heart of examing oneself prior to taking communion? It can be found in the same passage of scripture just a little before the aforementioned text. You see, there it can be found that honoring has nothing to do with not remembering what was done, but rather how people were conducting themselves during the meal. It actually says in scripture that people were getting drunk and eating all of the food so much so that there were those who actually did not get to enjoy anything. It would be like you inviting me to eat at your house, offering me a beer and before dinner was even properly served, I ate up everything in the house. How honoring would that be to you? Religion is all about the act, relationship is all about the heart.

Idolatorus Bible?

Sounds like an oxymoron does it not? But how many have said or heard people say to us, "I need to pray more." "I need to read the Bible more." Where did these phrases come from? They did not come from God nor did they come from His Son. There is no scripture that Jesus tells his disciples, the Pharisees, anybody that they need to read the Scriptures more. Sure, he told them at times that they were in error because they did not know the scriptures but he never used the word, "need" or "have to" in reference to them. As a matter of fact, there is not one scripture that points to itself as the need. So where did this infatuation of a book come from? Actually that is scriptural. Romans talks about people worshipping created things rather than the Creator. If I had a quarter for every time I have heard that the Bible is the Word of God, I'd have enough money to retire right now. Where in the scripture does it even mention that the Bible is the word of God? David said to God, "your word is a lamp unto my feet and a light for my path." But did David even have a Bible when he said that? No, he was strumming away on his musical instrument. I picture him chilling underneath a tree in the shadiest area making sweet music to the King of Kings and him pausing to listen to the heart of God. And it is clear in scripture that there were times that he was pissed off and wished harm on his enemies only to at the very end of the psalm, repent and come back to the place of love. Jesus said, 'man does not live on bread alone, but by every word of God." Sounds like he is referring to the Bible there does it not? Let's not forget though that Jesus IS the Word. "In the beginning was the Word. And the Word was with God and the Word was God." If the Word was the beginning and man had not even been around to write the "inspired words of God," then how can it be that the Bible is the word? A scripture that has been spoken to death regarding this matter is the passage in 1 Timothy where it says "every scripture is God-breathed and useful for correcting, rebuking, teaching..." This is the verse that justifies why the bible is incessantly praised. But let's really examine this: The scripture is God-breathed and USEFUL. Meaning it has use. Don't disregard it but don't treat it like the most valuable thing on the face of the earth either. I have things in my room that are of some use to me, but should they get ruined, I am not useless without them. It boggles my mind how this word has been replaced in Christianity to actually mean necessity. Jesus even told the Pharisees-who lived the scriptures better than you and I could ever-that "they study the scriptures because by them alone they believed they would have eternal life." What is the Son of God communicating here? That it is possible to know the bible inside and out yet have no relationship with the Father. Yes, sadly a book has replaced love for God. This is no different than the Israelites who worshipped a golden calf and called it "Yahweh." I used to think how foolish. Not anymore. The same goes on today. People praise and idolize a leather book with thin perishable pieces of paper and call it Yahweh. You ask, how is that the same, the Israelites were bowing down to a gold cow? Do not think it is the physical thing that separates us from the Israelites, it is the heart of the matter. This all goes back to the Garden of Eden where God said that because the fruit was eaten man now has the knowledge of good and evil. Meaning, they now knew evil existed. God is good, but now they have a knowledge that they never knew before: an opposite of good. Even more than that with two polar opposites now in the equation, without the Father, deciphering the good from the bad has now become jaded and up to each individual. When the rich young ruler called Jesus, good teacher, Jesus' response was, "why do you call me good? There is only one that is good which is God." The heart of the story in Deuteronomy is the golden cow was good in the eyes of the people. And the bible has been referred to what in our day? Yep, the good book. How it must grieve the Father's heart. And what's worse is that the very pieces of paper is used to justify or to cut other people down. Even if the bible was God's way of speaking to his people right now, how ludicrous and schizophrenic would He need to be to say in one breath, "I am love" and in the next breath to bash and criticize homosexuals and our government. Yes, sadly, Christianity has made for themselves an idol in the form of a book and have attempted to force people to read it or they are not "spiritual" enough. I for one am grateful that God is not hindered or powerless against our ignorance. He is still is control and I am seeing more people come out of this way of thinking and living loved which is a far cry from the "Jesus loves me, yes I know for the bible tells me so" way of living.

Lessons through Hardship

Religion brings pain

It's interesting what God will show a person in the midst of a difficult situtation. We had the viewing session for my brother last night and though it was an unsettling feeling for me as I made the drive to the funeral home, when it was all said and done, I am happy that I went. It really aided in the grieving process -- if one can really call it a process. But that's another story for another time. What I did want to write about happened the family and I were leaving. My other brother and I were having a deep discussion about faith. It started because when the viewing was taking place, my grandfather kept asking if the both of us were praying. He then proceeded to quote a scripture that says, "pray without ceasing." My brother, though he wanted could not convey what was really in his heart; that he was too pissed off to pray. Basically, he prayed for three years that Ryan would get well and now he has the sense as if God let him down; his faith as he says has been "shaken."

--Before I continue, I have to interject. This is one of the fundamental problems that I have with religion. The obligation of "doing." What I mean by that is religion teaches you to do all the right stuff (i.e., read the bible, pray, do what the bible says) and God will have favor on you. In other words play the part of a Christian and God will play the part of someone who is there for you always. That's pretty sick and twisted if you ask me. Not that I believe God is like that in any form or fashion, but to teach that to people who want to live a good life and are afraid of the fires of hell, that's wrong. The worse part about that is that when things don't work out the way they desire, now they're faced with more difficult questions such as "what didn't I or did I do to make God not answer my prayers and is God truly the God I have heard about or is He a liar? Is there even a God?" Such is the result of religion and the quandary my brother finds himself in.

Prayer=religion?

So now the question that most would be asking me about this time is, "do you believe prayers are religious? Do you pray? And what is prayer to you?" I believe prayer can be religious and believe it or not, I believe religious prayer can actually take away fellowship with the Spirit. Before I get labeled with the "heretic" sticker, let me explain. I believe that God can use what we have perceived for many years to be prayer as training for life with Him (so in no way am I condemning my grandfather or anyone for that matter), but Adam and Eve walked with God in the cool of the day. Scripture doesn't speak of being on their knees and closing their eyes or starting with "Dear Father," they were walking with God. I believe that God has been wanting to restore that level of fellowship with His children but religion muddies it with "right and wrong." When Eve was tempted, did not the tempter start with, "Did God really say...?" In other words, are you right about what you heard. Maybe you're wrong. Walking with God was never supposed to be about right or wrong. Sin brought that into the world. After our descendants ate from the fruit we sure did become like God knowing right from wrong. The problem is, we all learned our own definitions of what we believe are right and wrong. God made us in His image. We were given the power to create. And create we have. We create what we should do, what we need to do and many times, we project that onto others. Even the disciples asked Jesus to teach them to pray. They wanted to learn to pray correctly. Jesus gave them a great blueprint on how to communicate with the Father that still is a part of some churches' weekly ritual. So was that good? In that day and age, yes, because Jesus was right in front of them. He had not yet died on the cross and rose, therefore that broken fellowship was still there between God and man. It was great of the Son to teach His followers how to talk with His Dad. But now the Son has made it possible that what Adam and Eve experienced we now can have access to once more.

Jesus was pissed

As we got to talking my brother told me he still wants to pursue God --his words --but he is so mad that he doesn't want to talk to God. I told him, be angry. Anger is not a sin. I reminded him about Jesus being angry which I know I still don't get and I am pretty sure I can say the same about the people who profess faith in God.

There seems to be a huge disconnect when it's spoken in scripture that Jesus made a whip out of cords. Jesus the Savior of the world, premeditated an attack on the money changers and the people in the temple. He then proceeded to beat the living crap out of them and overthrew their tables. And I highly doubt he did that with a smile. He was pissed off!!! Yet now we have that scripture, "In your anger, do not sin." We would call the attack on the money changers sin, yet Jesus did not sin. Bottom line, we have no idea what sin is. And instead of trying to come up with our own definitions, why don't we just be real with ourselves and let God sort out the junk?

Faith cannot be shaken

It's impossible for my faith to be shaken. Why? Because I don't believe faith is a what, rather it's a who. Hebrews 11 says, "Now faith is being sure of what we hope for, uncertain for what we do not see." My hope is Christ. He is not a what. He is who. He is my hope of glory. And though I cannot see Him, I am sure that He lives. Jesus said while on the earth that He and the Father are one. God cannot be shaken. As a matter of fact, I think a song by Chris Tomlin called, "Indescribable" used "unshakeable" as a description of God. So it's established that neither Jesus or the Father are unshakeable; where's the correalation you may ask? Here it is: "Therefore if anyone is in Christ, He is a new creation, the old has gone, the new has come." If we are in Him, if He is our faith, we will never lose it. The only way we could ever lose Jesus would be if he gave up on us. But then the scriptures would be lying, because God promised that He would "never leave us or forsake us."

Unbroken fellowship

I think however it is quite possible for me to get rattled, because I am human. And though God looks at me through the lenses of His Son -- who is perfect --I myself, am not, which is great news knowing that I don't have to work at being perfect. I don't have to perform to maintain the perspective that God has had about me before the day I was born. I but need to live the life that He has called me to live and together with Him leading, the issues that He wants to address will be, but in His time, not mine. And that is the fellowship that Jesus has restored to us once again. The freedom of just being able to live in His love and walk with Him all the days of our lives, not worrying about whether we are pleasing Him enough or doing the right things. But knowing that He will always be there. He does not abandon, He does not give up on us. He is always right there.

Ryan

Even as I attempt to formulate words to describe how I am feeling right now, my mind remains empty. Oh, it's thinking of things to be sure, but there are just a range of emotions that I have regarding my brother. Though I still have trouble articulating the words in my heart, I was blessed to have watched a few home movies with my family tonight to remind me just what my little brother was like. More importantly, it really helped me to see what Ryan meant to me even if no audible words were coming out. Ryan was only 22 years of age, a baby, in the prime of his life. He went through nearly a three year battle with cancer and yet through everything he experienced, the same boy that I watched in those videos was exactly what I remember most about Ryan; his love for life. I can still remember as a young child, Ryan constantly irritating me to no end. Whether it was him chasing me around the house with a finger dripping with "boogies" or his burping, or if Ryan and I were talking about something that happened in my life that was traumatic, Ryan always lived with the perspective that life is too short to stress about things. In my embarassment, I saw how much of a pill I was in the home movies -- even in the middle of opening Christmas presents -- but then I saw Ryan having fun, living carefree. He had his "moody" days, to be sure as we all do, but what he wanted me to do was live with a childlike spirit. A spirit that said, "lighten up." I could talk about how me and Ryan drifted apart the last few years, but that's not important to me. I definitely wish I would've had more time with him, but now the question is, what do I do now that he is with the Lord? Do I regret on decisions I have made in the past or do I take what he was trying to show me from the day he was born -- chill out, lighten up, learn from your mistakes and move on? I choose to heed the advice and let that spirit live on through me. Thank you God for the 22 years that my brother was on this earth. Thank you for the impact he made and the lives that he touched. Thank you that I got to be close to him. Ryan, I love you man and I will miss you. Thanks for the laughs and the love baby brother. I will see you again someday. Until then, I praise God that you are no longer in pain and that you've met Jesus face-to-face.